next? a gun rack

"IT'S MY BOSS' CAR! I SWEAR!! IT'S NOT MINE!"

I was running an errands for my boss this afternoon. She's not the type of boss who would actually ask her assistant to run errands. I practically begged her to let me so that she'd have an hour or two in her office (unheard of) to whittle down her completely overwhelming to-do list before she goes out of town tomorrow. So if you saw me driving around town this afternoon in an SUV, allow me to repeat: It's my boss' car.

And if you see me driving around this next week in a different SUV ... that's my other boss' car! I'm housesitting for his family while they're away, and they graciously allow me to drive their vehicle when I need it ... except that's it's an SUV.

Let's say I'm not an SUV kinda gal. Except that when I drove one for the first time, I was all like, "Oooh, man. I could get used to this!" It was comfortable. COMFORTABLE comfortable. Like butter. And finally, I could see everything around me while driving, because of course I drive a small car and I usually can't see due to all the SUVs and huge-ass trucks. It was ... well, kinda nice.

So I see the appeal, but I have a few questions:
1. Why do my bosses (or my parents, for that matter) drive these machines? By all other accounts, these people are good, upstanding, card-carryiong money-where-their-mouths-are liberals (thank god). Can you be a liberal and drive an SUV? Are liberals, by proxy, environmentalists? Discuss.
2. Does anyone else remember when they were first becoming popular and they were called "sport utes" or just "utes" (pronounced yoot, short for utility)?
3. By a wide margin, the most commonly suggested sketch idea that "BFL* should totally do" was Law & Order: SUV. I know that's not a question, but I just thought of it.

*I doubt there's any reason to explain this, since I think everyone who reads this I have either slept with or wanted to* --- but BFL is Bald Faced Lie, a sketch group I was in in Seattle from circa 1995-2005. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. We were funny. RIP.

*Do I even need to explain that's a joke?

Comments

Anonymous said…
The visceral appeal of an SUV (large mass == "safer" in a collision; high stance makes it easier to see and be seen; small windows improve "womb-like" feel of security -- god, I wish I was kidding) seem to transcend political persuasion. Since SUVs became accepted as "mainstream" rather than the provenance of ballcap-wearin' good ol' boys (think mid-80s Ford Bronco), lots of people see their high points, and are influenced by the car company ads, which heavily promote SUVs.

Car companies like it too, of course, since SUVs are technically "light trucks" so they require less crash testing, and are under easier crash and rollover standards. They may also be under less restrictive emissions standards (I'm not as sure of that one, though). They also get to charge more for them, since they're "bigger" and must be harder to build, right? Combine that with the savings of less testing, and it's a recipe for success.

Anyway, until the mainstream image of an SUV moves from a "safer" vehicle to a "more dangerous" or "resource hog" vehicle, we're probably stuck with them. Check the crash stats if you're still under the "safer" delusion, it's pretty scary. The resource hog stuff is pretty obvious.

So, no, your liberal bosses are not necessarily bad liberals or anything, but they may have defaulted on a choice or two rather than devoting the time/research now necessary to find the best choice in a non-SUV car. It's a sad thing, but it's still a growing trend. Go marketing!

By the way, I think I missed out on the BFL sleep-with-Peggy train. Can I get a raincheck? Great! (PS: probably joking. Just kidding! Wait...)
(egg) said…
Yeah, but now it's kind of like smoking, right? I mean, for awhile people could pretend they didn't know it was bad for them, but now it's like common knowledge, right? Now it's simply a choice to ignore the negatives.
the beige one said…
Knowing of whom you speak, I must acknowledge the same conundrum. Huh.

IanJ has points, and we are talking about a man with a large family in one case, and a woman who lives out in the boonies in the other.

But still, these are folks who were raving about The Inconvenient Truth earlier in the year.
Anonymous said…
You CAN be a liberal and drive a gas-guzzler. You can be a fundamentalist Christian conservative and drive an electric car and recycle glass. You can be a tattooed, pierced, buzzed, wild looking man browsing for an electric blanket at Target. I've SEEN it. Humans (and I'm not including politicians here) are nuanced and complicated and do not stick to political or social agendas. We just don't.
(egg) said…
You are, of course, correct, Becky. I for sure don't think you need to drink the kool-aid to be a liberal. By the way, I'm driving their red minivan rather than the SUV this week. So I feel like a 80s soccer mom instead of an environment killer. (KIDDING! Here, quick - drink this kool-aid.)

And also, I think I dated that Traget guy.
Anonymous said…
Many liberals got that way in college, and college is expensive. Liberal arts college more so than others. Ergo, they are members of the higher economic strata, with the sorts of tastes in consumer goods that one would expect from people from that background. Show an ad of that SUV out in the rainforest, market it as a nature-lover's best friend ("You're a risk-taker who needs to get away to where the wild things are!") and watch the cognitive disconnect blossom in all its glory as people who claim to give a shit about the environment sink tens of thousands of dollars of their hard-earned money into a device that may as well run on a slurry of ground-up soldiers and spotted owls.

Of course, maybe their hauling needs are very great.
Anonymous said…
We're all a bit crazy here, and crazy means complicated. I'm with Becky on this one, the larger issue of liberals not acting like liberals (SUVs aside, forgive me for focusing on the detail) is just down to the fact that we're all human.

As an example, I doubt most people would peg me as a motorcyclist if they didn't already know. People who do know me as a motorcyclist might not guess that I do it, in a large part, because of a misguided notion that it's better for the environment (in a way it is, in a way it isn't, hence the recent move to bicycles when possible).

You and I may have latched onto (say) SUVs as a sign of the Coming Apocalypse. But other liberals may have latched onto (say) wasting water. We look at them and say they're killing the world without thinking, then they look at us and say the exact same thing. It may just be a matter of where you focus. Yes, SUVs are a questionable choice from a global perspective, but so is washing your clothes in an inefficient 1970s top-loader. (Both silly examples, chosen for silliness, by the way.) Both are real issues, but both demonstrate how we can't necessarily focus on all the good or bad we're doing.

I guess what it all boils down to is do what you can. If there's a part of your life you don't like, fix it. If you can't fix it, make it as not-bad as you can. If you can't change it, accept that and move on.
(egg) said…
Team NASA (aka IanJ) - that last paragraph is extrememly well-put.

(Lovely to see you last night, by the way!)
Basil said…
Well, it seems that IanJ has trumped me in the "knows what he's talking about" department yet again. So... what he said.
I will also side with you, Egg, in the "Holy crap, this is comfy" department. Like it or not, these babies are Lu-hu-hug-xurious. I drove many of them as a valet and I think the most digusting of them all - the Cadillac Escalade - took the cake. One could raise a small family in there.
The upside to some of these bigger vehicles these days is also Biodiesel, believe it or not. Some of those big, red-neck haulers actually cotton quite well to corn-fuel. They're just disguised as big loud farm machines.
I met a guy once who drove a big honkin' BioD truck and plastered the thing with "Powered by Biodiesel" stickers. Not to show off, he said, but to keep his rig from getting rocks thrown at it as he drove through town.
Takes all kinds.

Oh, and I totally slept with Egg. Are you kidding?
I put the "L" in BFL!
Whatever that means.
I gotta go...
Anonymous said…
wow, looking for a gun rack for my Ford Expedition and came accross this.... are you people aware that it creates more pollution to create a prius than it does a HUMMER? and in regaurds to flamingbanjo who claims i may as well run my 2 460 V-8's and 5.4 V8 on ground up soldiers, are you aware that the technology to run a motor on hydrogen has been around and known since before 1950? Your precious government whom these soldiers defend, do not allow any automaker to put any of this technology on the line, General motors has been trying for YEARS to get their electric car technology on the line, Finally they are allowed to put an electric car on the market i believe in 2013, called the chevy Volt, or voltage or something to that effect, its not that we dont have the technology, the world revolves around petroleum. and the U.S. government wouldnt have it any other way.....

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