hanging in there (midday of 8th day of detox)

I feel good. I'm over the hump, and now it's just a test of wills. I know I can make it through. But will I? There's no chance of me cheating; I don't even feel the need. However, there is a real chance of me simply choosing to stop early.

It's not about hunger, and it's not about being a slave to food. It's about the pure sensual, physical, social, romantic joy of eating. Texture, taste, temperature. The contrast & compliment of varied flavors. I really, truly miss it. It's not so much the food, it's the eating.

The biggest reason keeping me from quitting early? Vanity, pride, the fact I won't be able to claim that I really did it.

I think I'll do it. At this point - why not, right?


Suzanne said...

Go, Peggy, go!!

There's no stopping the will of a Cappie once she's put her mind to something. You're actually already there...

Boo said...

Don't stop now Peggy !
I am guessing there are more interesting things to discover about your relationship to eating.
I did a no reading 2 weeks ( doing artist way ) and it became so interesting to see all the different layers i hit about why i needed and wanted to read !
of course this is different, but go you, you're half way through !

Anonymous said...

I'm on my 8'th day of alchohol ceasation.
More simply put,, I havent' drank in 8 days.
It's hard.
anyway , I thought I'd share that, if possible to help you with your struggle.
Funny thing is , I realize now that the absolute worse thing that can happen on any given day , is that I could feel mortally sorry for myself.... and screw up. I'm fortunately kinda stubborn,, and I'm not letting that break me... so no boo hooing for myself.
Good luck,,